The term “move on” has never sat well with me. It seems to imply that whatever happens – you can just ignore it, forget it, or disregard it – and continue life without any scars.
Well life is not like that – your Spiritual and Emotional self – needs to heal, to accept, to forgive, to understand, to grieve, to acknowledge – all in the Faith/Belief/Hope/Certainty/Reason – that as long as you accept the ‘now’ – you can Move Forward with your life and do your best each day – time and honesty (self-honesty or Integrity) will eventually breath sunlight back into your life.
You cannot just “move on” from trauma or disappointment or physical or mental hurt. You are best to ensure that you Move Forward – whenever and however you are able
Admiral Stockdale a P.O.W stated his Stockdale Paradox:
“You must never confuse faith that you will prevail in the end—which you can never afford to lose—
with the discipline to confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be”
When faced with a challenge you need to acknowledge it, grieve it, handle it and move forward as you are able – this is more Possibility Thinking – in the sense that you hope in the eventual possible – while coping with what is here and now.
In his camp of P.O.W’s most of those who died were optimists – as they they kept putting a time or date on when they would be released. Ring any bells in our present situation in relation to a COVID19 vaccine?
The Admiral’s mindset was – that while you needed to believe that you would be released – you still had to accept the reality of where you were and the challenges you faced on a daily basis – so as to get through to the next day.
Robert H Schuller said it with his – Possibility Thinkers Creed
“When faced with a mountain – I will not quit! I will keep on striving until I climb over it – Find a pass through, tunnel underneath, or simply stay.
And turn the mountain into a miracle with God’s help” (or Hope or Reason or your own Belief system)
This is also where our own Integrity comes into play:
All of us most likely lack Integrity – We Lie to Ourselves Daily
No matter how well we live and work and interact with people – there is one person we usually LIE to on a very regular basis.
It is OUR SELF!!
How many times have we promised we would:
- Visit or call a friend or neighbour
- Improve our health by daily exercise and make some small changes to our food intake?
- Watch less TV and read a book instead?
- Determine our Purpose in life – and found it just too hard?
Evidence says that we are most happy when we accomplish, when we give, when we act, when we achieve.
Is it time to hold our self to account:
- Choose one Key behaviour you need to improve or change
- Put 10 $1 coins in your left pocket or purse slot
- Every time you succeed at this you put $1 in your left pocket or another slot
- When you act in reverse – then you move a $1 back to the initial pocket or slot
- By the end of each day you will know how you are tracking
- You can then gauge your own INTEGRITY
Let us decide to TAKE STOCK of our life TODAY – accept WHERE we are and WHO we have become – and MOVE FORWARD with a plan to become better each day! Coping with life and achieving our goals is a step by step process – there are some things we cannot or should not ignore and we cannot just MOVE ON. We need to understand and accept the REALITY IN THE NOW! Before we are able to face the MOVE FORWARD.
Be Kind and Patient with yourself knowing HOPE and CONFIDENCE will move you forward.